White Chocolate Bark

I like to watch the Barefoot Contessa. 

She has a show on the Food Network that's still actually about cooking. (Not crap like: How Tall Can You Build a Cake? or How Badly Can You Fuck Up Toast, Dumbass? Food Network has MTV syndrome.) Ina's ok, but parts of her, and her show, bug me. Like the ridiculously staged parties she throws, or the "surprise" she has for someone--like you haven't rehearsed it 17 times with your script and fucked with the lighting 'til it's just so. I also hate the way she makes everyone who's not her look like a fucking moron/child in the kitchen (Wow, Jeffrey! You turned the steaks all by yourself! Would you like a sticker?)

Anyhoo, this post was not meant to be a rant about Food Network or Ina Garten, because I actually do like her show. So I was watching it the other day, and she made drool-worthy white chocolate bark. I had a bag of white chocolate chips in the cupboard, as well as my favorite complementary flavors for this not-chocolate, so I hopped to making some.

I started with white chocolate chips, chopped pecans, dried apricots and dried cranberries.

Using Ina's tempering method, I microwaved 3/4 of the bag of white chocolate chips for 30 seconds, then stopped and stirred. Another 30 seconds, then another stir. I repeated about four times, until the chocolate was melty and smooth. Then I dumped in the rest of the chocolate chips and let the residual heat melt them.

 

Ina's bark recipe says to spread the chocolate out onto a cookie sheet first, then sprinkle on the toppings. But I don't want all the shit falling off the second I break the bark. So I just stirred the toppings into the chocolate and then spread it out.

Isn't it pretty? Then I just popped it into the fridge for about an hour. Voila! It was completely set, and because of my handy-dandy Silpat mat, I was easily able to extract the bark from the cookie sheet and break into pieces. 

The time for it to set is the longest part of the process. Making the bark took about five minutes; I don't know why I haven't made it before. But it'd be a great party snack, and the combinations are endless. I think next time I'll try dark chocolate with peanut butter chips and pretzels. Ok, that pretty much sounds spectacular! That is definitely in my future.

Happy Birthday, Cookie Monster!

Cookie Monster recently got another year better, and since he likes to eat tasty things, I made him a special birthday breakfast: chocolate chip waffles with chocolate sauce and whipped cream, and bacon.

 

Since it was a weekday, I prepared the waffle batter the night before so it was all ready for me in the morning. I simply added the batter to the hot waffle iron, then added chocolate chips on top. They melted into the waffle, making it chocolatety and gooey. In the meantime, I made a chocolate sauce by melting chocolate chips with some milk. When the waffle was done, I poured the chocolate sauce over the top, then topped it with whipped cream. A few raspberries were a lovely garnish. Served with bacon, this breakfast ensured Cookie Monster's birthday started off sweetly. The way to a man's heart indeed!

Snowpocalypse 2010 II: The Sequel

More snow. Lots of snow.

Check out the crazy icicles.

I swear, there's a car under there somewhere. . .

 

And here's a good thing to survive Snowpocalypse 2010 II: The Sequel:

Double Chocolate Pecan Biscotti

Hi all! I'm back from my blogging hiatus. Things have been busy, and well... I have been lazy. I find that blogging is a challenge because of two things: 1. Taking photos while I'm cooking is a pain in the ass. 2. My photos suck. Anyone have any tips for me?

I actually had some leisure time today; it's been a lazy Sunday afternoon, but very productive. I woke up and ran a 5K race this morning. Then Cookie Monster and I came home and decorated our Christmas tree. He had to go to work, so I wrapped Christmas presents and wrote Christmas cards. After two episodes of Sex & The City, I got bored, and when I'm bored, I usually cook. So, I decided to make biscotti.

The batter was pretty easy; just a bunch of mixing and measuring, as usual. It was also really tasty. :) In hindsight, I should've just eaten the batter.

Here is the recipe!

From my Better Homes & Gardens 75th Anniversary Edition cookbook

1/2 cup butter, softened
2/3 cup sugar
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 eggs
1 3/4 cup flour (I used whole wheat. That's all we have in the house. I don't buy AP flour anymore)
3/4 cup white baking pieces (I used pecans instead of these)
1/2 cup chocolate chips

Lightly grease a cookie sheet. In a large mixing bowl beat butter with an electric mixer on high for 30 seconds. Add sugar, cocoa powder and baking powder. Beat until combined, scraping sides of bowl occasionally. Beat in eggs until combined. Beat in as much flour as you can with the mixer. Stir in any remaining flour. ( I just used the mixer for all of it.) Stir in white baking pieces pecans and chocolate chips.


This is what the dough looks like before it's baked.



Shape dough into two 9-inch-long rolls. Place rolls on prepared cookie sheet; flatten slightly until about 2 inches wide.

Like this!
Here's a photo of the dough, along with my workstation. This is pretty typical of how it looks. Ingredients, cookbook (when I'm baking only), glass of vino, bottle of olive oil (that's actually olive oil in that Chianti bottle. I saved the bottle and use it for OI. It goes with my Italian-themed kitchen).
This is just how I roll.


Bake at 375 for 20-25 minutes or until a wooden toothpick inserted near center comes out clean. Cool on cookie sheet for 1 hour. (If desired, wrap cooled rolls in plastic wrap and let stand overnight at room temperature.)


Here's what the dough logs looks like after baking:




Use a serrated knife to cut each roll diagonally into 1/2-inch slices. Place slices cut side down on an ungreased cookie sheet. Bake at 325 for 8 minutes. Turn slices over and bake for 7-9 minutes more or until dry and crisp. Transfer to a wire rack and cool.


Also, don't forget about them in the oven and burn them, like I did. See? I burned the fucking biscotti. This is why I don't bake!
Please, send the kiddies outta the room. Here comes the potty mouth.
Fuck! Shit! Hell! Balls! Ohio!



But, I will not concede defeat. I ate them anyway. Carbon or not. That'll show 'em. They taste a little like campfire. But also pecan-chocolate biscotti.


Sigh.

My favorite Beer

So here we have my favorite beer to date: It's Rogue Chocolate Stout. Normally I'm a lighter beer kinda gal, like a Hefeweizen or something in that realm. I really don't dig IPAs--the hops are too intense a flavor and after 2-3 sips, all you can taste is HOPS. And I like other flavors in my beer.

Rogue Chocolate Stout is really dark and yet I still like it. It's very rich and it's very chocolately. Cookie Monster dislikes it, actually, because it has too much chocolate flavor. But what's not to like? It's chocolate. And beer. Together. A match made in Heaven!


Of course, my Rogue Chocolate Stout is no Bulmer's, but then I live absolutely nowhere near Ireland or the UK, so I'm SOL on that.

I love beer. Beer-y beer beer.